the great divide

In the (very fine) country of Britannia, there is nothing so indicative of wealth and/or class and/or status than TOILET PAPER.  In primary school (because it’s paid for by the government) we are subjected to a variety of grease-proof paper – not too pleasant – and as we ascend the social ladder we graduate from Sainsbury’s stuff to Andrex and so on, until we reach The Summit:  QUILTED.  A beautiful and wonderful thing, and totally worth the expense, in my estimation.

Egypt though: a whole different realm.  There is a reason why there has never (as far as I know) been a revolutionary uprising of the working man against everyone else, and a very simple one too – everyone has the same type of toilet paper. [it’s a kind of dimply one, by the way; a bit like kitchen roll.]  This is the Great Leveller – reconciliation across the Great Divide.

If only we could see that kind of class emancipation in my land; if only we could be united in our most private moments …  Then, what integrity we’d then have in our public moments!

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